I had a very unique childhood; for privacy reasons, I won't describe exactly where I spent my younger years, but if you envision a medium-sized castle overlooking the water, that would be similar to my home growing up. Stone walls, wrought iron gates, security, and tourists snapping pictures...that was my life. Before you get the wrong idea, we weren't wealthy, we were part of the working class; the servants, in a way. Regardless of our station though, we still got to live there; surrounded by the safety that thick impenetrable walls provide. Our quarters were located deep inside of this massive home, if you could call it a home; it was a museum of sorts, and we were hidden inside of it's protective chambers.
I remember, as a child, being afraid of the dark shadows and the rattling of my bedroom windows through which all I could see were the top of the trees. Those things frightened me in an old, haunted kind of way, but fears of break-ins or fires burning down our home, those were things I never thought of...why would I? No one could hurt me there.
When I got married the thing people would tease my husband about was how he was ever going to afford to keep up with the "lifestyle I was accustom to"; it was a funny joke that neither one of us took seriously, but there was one adjustment that I didn't expect. I had never lived a "normal" house, and suddenly fears of break-ins, fires, etc. became very real. With a husband who travels as much as mine does, there was really no time to get used to living alone in a house that wasn't my safe castle...I was thrown directly into a living situation where I was very vulnerable to real life....eek...
For years, every time Cory has left, I have slept with at least a few lights on, if not all of them; I fall asleep with the TV going because the silence scares me. It wasn't until this past year that I have become braver, and now I just leave the bathroom light on when I go to bed; maybe I'm growing up a little.
I decided recently though that I really need to be stronger for my boys, and I need to start trusting God more because even if I can't see in the dark, He can. I had been doing okay with this new resolve to not fear the night until two nights ago; I have always known that Satan attacks people at their weakest points, but lately I have felt those attacks in a very real way.
I don't usually have dreams, but that night I did, and it was a bad one; it was the running for you life kind of dream, and it freaked me out so much that I woke up with a start and sat straight up in bed. I had relaxed my policy on no windows being left open at night, and had decided for that one night I could leave the one in my room open. Remembering this, I immediately shut and locked it. Turning some lights on, I checked on the boys; they were still all fast asleep in there beds. I laid back down and succumb to my vivid imagination; fearing for our safety, and for Cory's so far away from us. I began to half-heartedly pray, and through the sleepy cobwebs in my mind I tried to call upon the scripture hidden there.
Somewhere in the night, I fell asleep, but the next day the fears returned. I was sure danger was lurking somewhere, that something bad was going to happen; have you ever felt that way? Have you ever been haunted by a fear that isn't founded in reality? Satan had me going, and I was buying into it in a big way. The day passed and night fell again; the fears grew stronger. I imagined the knock at the door telling me my husband would never come home, I imagined hearing glass breaking and someone entering uninvited, I imaged smoke filling my room, or a phone call telling me some unthinkable accident had occurred; fear is of Satan, and I know that, but my mind is weak and my imagination is limitless.
As I prayed over Samuel last night, a thought fluttered through my mind, "I wish I was home..." I wouldn't be scared this way if I was safe in the confines on my castle, the fortress of my childhood; fear couldn't touch me there. Then, as only God can, He spoke to me, "I am your Fortress, Amanda. Why are you not asking Me to be that for you?" And suddenly, in that moment, I was free; Satan's grasp faltered, and then it all together fell away. My God is my Fortress; how could I have forgotten that?
I don't have to be physically inside a castle, He has to be inside of my heart. Fear grows and festers inside of the deepest recesses of our soul; if it finds a foothold there, it builds it's home and it makes itself good and comfortable. Some people live in fear daily, it becomes their master, and it defines what they do and how they feel.
The bible has quite a bit to say about fear; I like Psalm 46:1, "God is our refuge and strength, an ever-present help in trouble." I love the words "ever-present"; there is never a time when He is not with us. My favorite verse though, and the one I prayed last night, is Psalm 91:2, "...'He is my refuge and my fortress, my God, in whom I trust."
Satan will attack where he knows he has a chance of tripping you up; for me, fear of the dark and of the unknown is very, very real. He had me going for a little while until I turned to my "ever-present help", "my refuge and my fortress"; when I did that, my fear packed up and head for the hills. God brings freedom when we turn to Him. He knows your weaknesses too, but do you know what He says about your weaknesses? In 2 Corinthians 12:9 Paul is speaking, "But He said to me, 'My grace is sufficient for you, My power is made perfect in weakness.'" His power is waiting to step in when I am weak; He loves me that much. He knows where I stumble, He knows where Satan will attack, and He says, "Turn to Me, and I will make you strong."
Are you fearing something today? Do you need to feel the protection of a fortress surrounding you? Is Satan bringing wave upon wave of attacks directly at your weakest point? Don't give in; rely on the One who promises to be your Refuge, your Fortress, and your Deliverer from fear. Isaiah 41:10 says, "So do not fear, for I am with you; do not be dismayed , for I am your God. I will strengthen you and help you; I will uphold you with my righteous right hand" Do you know that He is with you? Have you asked Him, specifically, to be your fortress?
Fear can and will find a foothold if you leave yourself open to it; I spent 24 hours fearing the lies the devil planted in my mind. The good news is that when I surrendered it all to God, His relief, my rescue, was instantaneous. When you let God in, fear moves out. Our souls aren't capable of fully serving two masters, and our God promises that if we lean on Him entirely He will take care of everything else.
Ask God to build His impenetrable fortress around you because in Him there is no fear. Step out in faith and He will meet you where you are, giving strength in your weakness, and never leaving you in trouble. Trust in Him, and in Him alone.
Tuesday, July 31, 2012
Saturday, July 28, 2012
The Voice of Creation
Our older boys play baseball on Saturday mornings; we signed them up at our local YMCA, and the games are played right down the street at our town's middle school. It's usually a hectic time for me with two boys on two different teams; sometimes they play at different times, but sometimes they play at the same time on different fields, and they never play each other. It's definitely a challenge when you factor in keeping our little guy occupied in the stroller for up to 2 hours at a time, but I try to make it enjoyable for all involved, and usually we do okay. This morning actually went better than I expected, and I was able to relax and take in some of Micah's game. Micah's coach is really good with the kids, and he has taken to allowing Samuel to be a base coach on the days his game is at a later time. That leaves me and my little man to cheer on the sidelines.
This morning I parked the stroller right next to the dugout just in time for the game to begin; there seemed to be less of a crowd then usual which made it calmer and more peaceful. I like the Y program because they don't keep score; it's not competitive in any way; it's just fun. Every player gets up to bat in every inning and there are no strikes; it is a slow paced family game in which every child is made to feel like a slugger...I like that.
As I sat there watching and feeding Jude his favorite game time snack - ice chips - I caught part of a conversation going on amongst a small group of people seated next to us. I wasn't trying to eavesdrop, but what I heard was an argument between a man and woman, and they weren't really being quiet about it. The man said, "So I heard that you don't believe in God??..." The woman said, "So what? No, I don't believe in God!" The man went on to argue for God, there was a bit of back and forth, and then the woman turned to what I presume was the man's wife and said, "How can you live with this man?!?!?"
It wasn't a heated argument but one in which you could tell there wasn't much respect for each other, or each other's view point. I tried to turn my attention back to the game, but I found myself pondering the arguments I heard both for and against God. As I did this, I looked around at the kids on the field, I looked up to the blue sky dotted with cotton ball clouds, I saw a bird fly by, and I glanced the chubby toes of my toddler resting on the edge of the stroller. I couldn't help but to think about how I could see God everywhere; His touch is on every bit of creation. I couldn't help but think about this woman sitting next to me who was so vehemently denying the existence of her Creator; how is it that some eyes refuse to see Him?
I don't have an answer to that, but when we got home, after lunch was served and nap time began, I sat down with my bible. I turned to my reading for today, and believe or not, this is what it said:
Every intricate detail that surrounds us, every flower that blossoms, every bird that soars through the sky, everything in all of creation sings to us of His glory. If you are having a hard time seeing that, or if you don't know what to believe in, or if you are unsure of His existence at all...whatever the wall that blocks you from Him...I ask you to pray to Him. Pray that He will remove the blinders from your eyes, pray that He will help you to see and feel that He is who He says He is. Sincerely pray to God that He might help you to see clearly the world around you, so that you may experience fully the call of all creation; there is "no speech or language where it's voice is not heard." Our God, who loves you with a never ending, unconditional love, will answer you when you turn to Him; don't except denial. Look into your children's eyes, look to the mountains and the trees, to the ocean, to the birds, to the beauty all around you, and understand that none of it "accidentally" happened...we have a Creator who loves you and is waiting for you to open your eyes and see Him.
This morning I parked the stroller right next to the dugout just in time for the game to begin; there seemed to be less of a crowd then usual which made it calmer and more peaceful. I like the Y program because they don't keep score; it's not competitive in any way; it's just fun. Every player gets up to bat in every inning and there are no strikes; it is a slow paced family game in which every child is made to feel like a slugger...I like that.
As I sat there watching and feeding Jude his favorite game time snack - ice chips - I caught part of a conversation going on amongst a small group of people seated next to us. I wasn't trying to eavesdrop, but what I heard was an argument between a man and woman, and they weren't really being quiet about it. The man said, "So I heard that you don't believe in God??..." The woman said, "So what? No, I don't believe in God!" The man went on to argue for God, there was a bit of back and forth, and then the woman turned to what I presume was the man's wife and said, "How can you live with this man?!?!?"
It wasn't a heated argument but one in which you could tell there wasn't much respect for each other, or each other's view point. I tried to turn my attention back to the game, but I found myself pondering the arguments I heard both for and against God. As I did this, I looked around at the kids on the field, I looked up to the blue sky dotted with cotton ball clouds, I saw a bird fly by, and I glanced the chubby toes of my toddler resting on the edge of the stroller. I couldn't help but to think about how I could see God everywhere; His touch is on every bit of creation. I couldn't help but think about this woman sitting next to me who was so vehemently denying the existence of her Creator; how is it that some eyes refuse to see Him?
I don't have an answer to that, but when we got home, after lunch was served and nap time began, I sat down with my bible. I turned to my reading for today, and believe or not, this is what it said:
"The heavens declare the glory of God; the skies proclaim the work of His hands. Day after day they pour forth speech; night after night they display knowledge. There is no speech or language where their voice is not heard. Their voice goes out into all the earth, their words to the end of the world. "
Psalm 19:1-4
With every turn of our head, we can see the proclamation of God's glory; creation speaks of Him continually. I don't understand the blindness that some people have; I don't understand the rationalization of those who deny Him, but I know they do because I saw it first hand this morning.
I am thanking God today that His Presence, His beauty, and His existence are clear to me. I am praying for the woman sitting next to me this morning, and for those like her who, for whatever reason, have blinders over their eyes; those who are unable to see Him, and to feel His Presence.
I am thanking God today that His Presence, His beauty, and His existence are clear to me. I am praying for the woman sitting next to me this morning, and for those like her who, for whatever reason, have blinders over their eyes; those who are unable to see Him, and to feel His Presence.
Every intricate detail that surrounds us, every flower that blossoms, every bird that soars through the sky, everything in all of creation sings to us of His glory. If you are having a hard time seeing that, or if you don't know what to believe in, or if you are unsure of His existence at all...whatever the wall that blocks you from Him...I ask you to pray to Him. Pray that He will remove the blinders from your eyes, pray that He will help you to see and feel that He is who He says He is. Sincerely pray to God that He might help you to see clearly the world around you, so that you may experience fully the call of all creation; there is "no speech or language where it's voice is not heard." Our God, who loves you with a never ending, unconditional love, will answer you when you turn to Him; don't except denial. Look into your children's eyes, look to the mountains and the trees, to the ocean, to the birds, to the beauty all around you, and understand that none of it "accidentally" happened...we have a Creator who loves you and is waiting for you to open your eyes and see Him.
"Through Him all things were made; without Him nothing was made that has been made." John 1:3
Thursday, July 26, 2012
God Makes a Way
We have had a very busy day today, and as I logged on to the computer tonight, I really had no thought of writing a post...I wasn't feeling very inspired. I fiddled around on my email, checked the stats on the blog, and then shut it down. I did my nightly sink full of dishes, made some tea, and headed toward the bedrooms to fold laundry...yippee. On my way by, I quietly slipped into my older boys' room to do what I have just this week started doing...praying over them. If you've never tried it with your kids, you should. There is something wonderful that happens when in the silence of their sleep you hold them and pray for them.
Samuel was still awake; my big seven year old tries to hold out as late as he can before finally giving in to bedtime. I held him; he looked up at me and said, "Mommy, I love you with all of my heart."
I moved to the lower bunk, looked at my sleeping Micah, and in that moment I felt God asking me to share something special that He revealed to me today.
My laundry can wait, and if you can excuse the late night rambling of a weary mother, I will share with you the blessing Micah gave me today...
I tell Micah all the time, "I love you with all of my Micah love"; my "Micah love" is deep, and as far as the east is from the west. In order for you to understand my love for Micah though, I need to describe him and his personality. Micah was born screaming, and he has never stopped. I barely remember the first two years of his life; the days are a blur of exhaustion, frustration, and to a point, hopelessness. He was honestly the most difficult child I had ever witnessed; you could call it strong-willed, thick headed, stubborn... The child never slept more than ten minutes at a time for the first six months of his life, and then after that, we were lucky if it was two hours at a time.
I had a great group of friends who all had young children as well; they constantly offered to help me, and when I pointed out that they had their own kids to worry about, I remember one of them saying, "Yes, but we all know your situation is different. Micah is different." And he was...
God gave me Micah, and He walked side by side with me through the fog of the early part of his life, holding me up and sometimes carrying me through the months and years.
Here we are five years later. Micah is incredibly sweet; he is loving and kind. His preschool teachers would always tell me how he was the "classroom cheerleader"; always having encouraging words to say to his friends. Not only that, but he is cute; he is funny and crazy; he loves to dance and be silly, but Micah still has another side to him...
Every once in a while, that old strong-headedness comes out, and I catch a glimpse of that two year old screaming his head off, thrashing around on the floor: Micah has a temper. It's not out of control, and he can mostly keep it contained, but it's there; always under the surface.
Whether it's that he has been really tired lately, or that his dad has been away too long, or that he's bored and ready to get back to school...whatever the reason...that temper has been rearing it's ugly head. The battle of the wills that played out in our kitchen last night was epic; it will go down in the Micah history books as one of the most difficult battles fought in our house. He didn't win, of course, and was rightly disciplined, but as I scrubbed Hamburger Helper off the window, and the floor, and the table, I asked God, "Why? Why now when You have been teaching me so much about Yourself? Why now when I feel so close to You? Why do I feel so defeated? Why does it feel like this is Satan testing me? How can I feel Your presence when I am frustrated and overwhelmed with a child who is so strong willed?"
I'm not angry in my discipline, and I follow what I believe to be God's leading in it, but it doesn't make it easy, and I don't have a warm, fuzzy feeling afterwards; in the end, I feel disappointed that we had to get to that point, especially when most of the time Micah is such an amazing kid. As I prayed over him last night, I really prayed for answers as to whether I was disciplining correctly, and as to why these outburst were occurring (this was just one in a list we've had lately). I still couldn't shake the feeling that it was a testing for me in some way.
This morning when I opened my eyes, Micah's face was the first one I saw. With his sleepy eyes and he bedhead, he came trudging into my room, bright and early. He gave me a big hug and told me good morning. He's always been my early riser (when he sleeps at all), and I can always count on his bright smile to get me going in the morning. Today Micah was full of questions about obedience; he wanted to understand why he had to obey certain things that his 19 month old brother doesn't. I found that all I had to say today when he even remotely started to not listen was, "are you going to chose to obey or disobey?", and right away he was onto whatever task I gave him; it was a joy.
This afternoon I was able to take the boys to the playground briefly in the middle of two different doctor appointments. I hung back at the car because my little guy was sleeping, but I watched my older two race from slide to slide then onto the monkey bars, and finally the rock wall. Suddenly, Micah started running towards the car with a huge smile on his face; he said, "Mommy! Mommy! I did it!! I did it!! I climbed the wall! I was scared, but I knew God was with me, so I did it! I couldn't do it yesterday, but I could today because I knew God was with me!!" His joy and excitement was bubbling over, and it was contagious; he was jumping up and down, and he was in awe that God had allowed him the strength to climb this little playground rock wall. I thought, "if only I got so excited about each wall He helps me over..."
When I tucked them into bed tonight, Micah had that same exploding excitement when he told me that last night he prayed to God that He would help him not have nightmares, but to give him good dreams, "and He did, Mommy!! God gave me good dreams so that I could sleep all night!! I'm going to pray the same thing tonight!" His joy over what God had done for him last night was incredible, indescribable really. You see last night, when I was so discouraged and upset with what had transpired in our kitchen, Micah was in his bed praying that God would help him to sleep better. You know what the awesome part was...he did sleep...all three of my boys slept all night long, and I woke up a better Mommy for it.
Micah's attitude lately has been testing me, and really, for as long as he has been alive he has tested me in ways I could never have imagined, but when I stopped and prayed specifically for what I needed, God revealed an amazing thing: Micah is in the palm of His hand. I feel confident in my discipline of Micah because he displayed an amazing amount of understanding about the "obedience" talk we had last night; he wanted to understand it further today, and he asked me all kinds of questions about it throughout the day. God also made a way for me to see Him through Micah today, and that was so special. To see the excitement and wonder in his eyes over what God can do when we pray was priceless, and it made me see that God had answered my prayers as well; maybe I need to be jumping up and down in joy for that! God wove His way through my disappointment and discouragement, and showed me that He is with me, and that He has His hand directly on Micah. There is nothing God can't do when we turn to Him and ask Him for help; Micah discovered that today, and through his excitement, I could see that amazing truth with my own eyes.
My "Micah love" is huge; in spite of his screaming (we call it his "voice immodulation problem"), or maybe partly because of it, I love him in ways that are completely unique to him. Just as Samuel has taught me to see the world through a different lens, Micah has shown me how to embrace the world full force. He loves to live, and he barrels through life like an unstoppable force, but every once in a while God slows him down and reveals to me that He is still in control.
I thank God for Micah everyday, and especially today when His answers to my prayers came straight from my little man himself.
"With your help I can advance against a troop; with my God I can scale a wall...God arms me with strength, and He makes my ways perfect." Psalm 18:29 and 32
Samuel was still awake; my big seven year old tries to hold out as late as he can before finally giving in to bedtime. I held him; he looked up at me and said, "Mommy, I love you with all of my heart."
I moved to the lower bunk, looked at my sleeping Micah, and in that moment I felt God asking me to share something special that He revealed to me today.
My laundry can wait, and if you can excuse the late night rambling of a weary mother, I will share with you the blessing Micah gave me today...
I tell Micah all the time, "I love you with all of my Micah love"; my "Micah love" is deep, and as far as the east is from the west. In order for you to understand my love for Micah though, I need to describe him and his personality. Micah was born screaming, and he has never stopped. I barely remember the first two years of his life; the days are a blur of exhaustion, frustration, and to a point, hopelessness. He was honestly the most difficult child I had ever witnessed; you could call it strong-willed, thick headed, stubborn... The child never slept more than ten minutes at a time for the first six months of his life, and then after that, we were lucky if it was two hours at a time.
I had a great group of friends who all had young children as well; they constantly offered to help me, and when I pointed out that they had their own kids to worry about, I remember one of them saying, "Yes, but we all know your situation is different. Micah is different." And he was...
God gave me Micah, and He walked side by side with me through the fog of the early part of his life, holding me up and sometimes carrying me through the months and years.
Here we are five years later. Micah is incredibly sweet; he is loving and kind. His preschool teachers would always tell me how he was the "classroom cheerleader"; always having encouraging words to say to his friends. Not only that, but he is cute; he is funny and crazy; he loves to dance and be silly, but Micah still has another side to him...
Every once in a while, that old strong-headedness comes out, and I catch a glimpse of that two year old screaming his head off, thrashing around on the floor: Micah has a temper. It's not out of control, and he can mostly keep it contained, but it's there; always under the surface.
Whether it's that he has been really tired lately, or that his dad has been away too long, or that he's bored and ready to get back to school...whatever the reason...that temper has been rearing it's ugly head. The battle of the wills that played out in our kitchen last night was epic; it will go down in the Micah history books as one of the most difficult battles fought in our house. He didn't win, of course, and was rightly disciplined, but as I scrubbed Hamburger Helper off the window, and the floor, and the table, I asked God, "Why? Why now when You have been teaching me so much about Yourself? Why now when I feel so close to You? Why do I feel so defeated? Why does it feel like this is Satan testing me? How can I feel Your presence when I am frustrated and overwhelmed with a child who is so strong willed?"
I'm not angry in my discipline, and I follow what I believe to be God's leading in it, but it doesn't make it easy, and I don't have a warm, fuzzy feeling afterwards; in the end, I feel disappointed that we had to get to that point, especially when most of the time Micah is such an amazing kid. As I prayed over him last night, I really prayed for answers as to whether I was disciplining correctly, and as to why these outburst were occurring (this was just one in a list we've had lately). I still couldn't shake the feeling that it was a testing for me in some way.
This morning when I opened my eyes, Micah's face was the first one I saw. With his sleepy eyes and he bedhead, he came trudging into my room, bright and early. He gave me a big hug and told me good morning. He's always been my early riser (when he sleeps at all), and I can always count on his bright smile to get me going in the morning. Today Micah was full of questions about obedience; he wanted to understand why he had to obey certain things that his 19 month old brother doesn't. I found that all I had to say today when he even remotely started to not listen was, "are you going to chose to obey or disobey?", and right away he was onto whatever task I gave him; it was a joy.
This afternoon I was able to take the boys to the playground briefly in the middle of two different doctor appointments. I hung back at the car because my little guy was sleeping, but I watched my older two race from slide to slide then onto the monkey bars, and finally the rock wall. Suddenly, Micah started running towards the car with a huge smile on his face; he said, "Mommy! Mommy! I did it!! I did it!! I climbed the wall! I was scared, but I knew God was with me, so I did it! I couldn't do it yesterday, but I could today because I knew God was with me!!" His joy and excitement was bubbling over, and it was contagious; he was jumping up and down, and he was in awe that God had allowed him the strength to climb this little playground rock wall. I thought, "if only I got so excited about each wall He helps me over..."
When I tucked them into bed tonight, Micah had that same exploding excitement when he told me that last night he prayed to God that He would help him not have nightmares, but to give him good dreams, "and He did, Mommy!! God gave me good dreams so that I could sleep all night!! I'm going to pray the same thing tonight!" His joy over what God had done for him last night was incredible, indescribable really. You see last night, when I was so discouraged and upset with what had transpired in our kitchen, Micah was in his bed praying that God would help him to sleep better. You know what the awesome part was...he did sleep...all three of my boys slept all night long, and I woke up a better Mommy for it.
Micah's attitude lately has been testing me, and really, for as long as he has been alive he has tested me in ways I could never have imagined, but when I stopped and prayed specifically for what I needed, God revealed an amazing thing: Micah is in the palm of His hand. I feel confident in my discipline of Micah because he displayed an amazing amount of understanding about the "obedience" talk we had last night; he wanted to understand it further today, and he asked me all kinds of questions about it throughout the day. God also made a way for me to see Him through Micah today, and that was so special. To see the excitement and wonder in his eyes over what God can do when we pray was priceless, and it made me see that God had answered my prayers as well; maybe I need to be jumping up and down in joy for that! God wove His way through my disappointment and discouragement, and showed me that He is with me, and that He has His hand directly on Micah. There is nothing God can't do when we turn to Him and ask Him for help; Micah discovered that today, and through his excitement, I could see that amazing truth with my own eyes.
My "Micah love" is huge; in spite of his screaming (we call it his "voice immodulation problem"), or maybe partly because of it, I love him in ways that are completely unique to him. Just as Samuel has taught me to see the world through a different lens, Micah has shown me how to embrace the world full force. He loves to live, and he barrels through life like an unstoppable force, but every once in a while God slows him down and reveals to me that He is still in control.
I thank God for Micah everyday, and especially today when His answers to my prayers came straight from my little man himself.
"With your help I can advance against a troop; with my God I can scale a wall...God arms me with strength, and He makes my ways perfect." Psalm 18:29 and 32
Wednesday, July 25, 2012
In His Prescence
I love to read; I have read six books in the last five weeks, and just started number seven last night. I read for pleasure and for escape, but I also read for knowledge, and to gain wisdom. There have been times I have read books that I shouldn't have read; books that graphically paint pictures in my mind that shouldn't be there, or books that haunt me in my dreams. There have been times, more recently though, that God has led me to books about Him; books that draw me closer to Him, and reveal more and more of Himself to me. I wrote in an earlier post about my discovery of If by Amy Carmichael, but since then I have read Fearless by Eric Blehm, and I Dared to Call Him Father by Bilquis Sheikh. Each of these books have touched me deeply, and have brought about an inward examination of my own heart.
Fearless is the true story of a Navy SEAL named Adam Brown who overcame obstacle after obstacle in his mission to live for Christ, and to do exactly what God had planned for his life; nothing got him down. Through addiction, injury and many swerves in the road, he pushed forward, fearlessly trusting God's leading, and ultimately laying his life down on the battlefield in Afghanistan.
I Dared to Call Him Father is the true story of Muslim woman in Pakistan who, through God's power in her life and in her dreams, came to know Jesus. She converted to Christianity; she faced abandonment by her family, being viewed as a traitor by the Muslims in her country, and threats to her life and to the life of her grandson who lived with her. It is an amazing account of how God walks with us daily, and how He still clearly speaks to us when we choose to listen and to follow His leading.
The reason I'm mentioning these two books is because for the past few days I have felt a strong sense of God working in me; these books have aided in what feels like a revelation that my heart is on the verge of making. I can't quite put into words...yet...what is going on inside of me, but I made a list of what my mind has been meditating on in the light of what these books have taught me.
Number One: Tell your story. We all have a story of God's grace in our lives. If we have had stumbling blocks we've overcome, addictions we've conquered, fears we've let go of, tragedies we've found ways to rejoice in, if we have witnessed and felt, first hand, God's work in our lives...we need to share it. I am in awe of these stories that I have read, and of the courage it took to share them with the world. They were used to change my life...what's God's story in your life? Could it be used to help someone else?
Psalm 145:3-7 says, "Great is the Lord and most worthy of praise; His greatness no one can fathom. One generation will commend your works to another; they will tell of your mighty acts. They will speak of the glorious splendor of your majesty, and I will meditate on your wonderful works. They will tell of the power of your awesome works, and I will proclaim your great deeds. They will celebrate your abundant goodness and joyfully sing of your righteousness."
That pretty much says it all right there...I'm meditating on God's mighty acts and great deeds because those who have gone before me told me of the work He did in their lives. Thank you Father.
Number Two: Have no fear. The title of Fearless speaks to that end. Adam Brown, attacked every task given to him with no fear; he trusted that God was in control of the outcome...so did his wife who walked hand in hand with him through drug addiction and the military life. In I Dared to Call Him Father, Bilquis Sheikh says, "...I was learning what it was like to live from hour to hour. It was the opposite of worrying. It was waiting to see what He was going to allow. For I was convinced that nothing occurred without His permission....I would just live hour to hour, staying near Him." There is no fear when we trust in Him.
In Mark 5:36, Jesus is talking to a father who has just been told his daughter had died; Jesus says, "Don't be afraid; just believe." Jesus brought the girl back to life. He works in mighty ways when we put our fears aside and trust fully in Him.
Number Three: I am spoiled. I have no idea what real suffering is; I have been hurt emotionally...horribly... but ultimately, I have no idea what it's like to stand in a life or death situation having only God to rely on. What courage and Godly strength it must take to stand firm in spite of severe opposition and to know with extreme certainty that you are doing exactly what God wants you to be doing in that moment. To be squarely in His presence. I'm not discounting the "suffering" that I have encountered in my life (or you in yours), but to read of missions on the "front line"...whether in a physical war such as in Fearless, or a spiritual war such as in I Dared to Call Him Father...it puts life into a different perspective, and it opens your eyes to see how much more you could do in the name of Jesus. Step by step, through injury, and strongholds of addiction and fear, God will walk with us and guide us when we are obedient to Him.
Number Four: I need to get in tune with God. I want with all of my heart to hear His voice, and to follow it. Again, in I Dared to Call Him Father , Bilquis says, "Part of the key to staying in His company was obedience. When I obeyed, then I was allowed to remain in His Presence." To be so close to God and in such obedience to Him that I continually feel His Presence with me...how I long to have that...to be that person.
Number Five: "The Moses' Rod Principle". In I Dared to Call Him Father, Bilquis describes this "principle". She says, "When we pray, He wants to work with us...If I just put the problem in the Lord's hands without stepping out in faith myself, I might never have gotten the clearance (speaking of a document she needed to obtain). I had to step out and do everything I could... Just as God required Moses to strike the rock with a rod, He asks us, too, to participate in the working of miracles" (Numbers 20). God wants me to do my part in the fulfillment of His plan.
Number Six: Give 100% all the time. In Fearless, Adam Brown gave all he had in every situation; no matter how menial the task given to him, he jumped in with both feet and worked until it was completed. In I Dared to Call Him Father, Bilquis Sheikh walked away from everything she had ever know, her traditions and her family, to follow Jesus 100%. That's what God wants from us: every part of us...glorifying Him in all we do... Why is that so hard sometimes?
Number Seven: I need to let go of worry. Again, in I Dared to Call Him Father, Bilquis says, "This nervousness is not founded in You. I cannot trust You and worry at the same time!" I think I need to post that on every wall in my house. Worry is not of God. Philippians 4:6-7 says, "Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus."
As all of these thoughts roll around inside of my mind and my heart, I am confident of this: When we lay everything aside, when we "throw off everything that hinders and the sin that so easily entangles" (Hebrews 12:1), and when we, in obedience, step out in faith towards Him, we find that true joy can only be found in His Presence.
I am on a journey to live in His Presence; I long to fearlessly walk with Him always. How about you?
Fearless is the true story of a Navy SEAL named Adam Brown who overcame obstacle after obstacle in his mission to live for Christ, and to do exactly what God had planned for his life; nothing got him down. Through addiction, injury and many swerves in the road, he pushed forward, fearlessly trusting God's leading, and ultimately laying his life down on the battlefield in Afghanistan.
I Dared to Call Him Father is the true story of Muslim woman in Pakistan who, through God's power in her life and in her dreams, came to know Jesus. She converted to Christianity; she faced abandonment by her family, being viewed as a traitor by the Muslims in her country, and threats to her life and to the life of her grandson who lived with her. It is an amazing account of how God walks with us daily, and how He still clearly speaks to us when we choose to listen and to follow His leading.
The reason I'm mentioning these two books is because for the past few days I have felt a strong sense of God working in me; these books have aided in what feels like a revelation that my heart is on the verge of making. I can't quite put into words...yet...what is going on inside of me, but I made a list of what my mind has been meditating on in the light of what these books have taught me.
Number One: Tell your story. We all have a story of God's grace in our lives. If we have had stumbling blocks we've overcome, addictions we've conquered, fears we've let go of, tragedies we've found ways to rejoice in, if we have witnessed and felt, first hand, God's work in our lives...we need to share it. I am in awe of these stories that I have read, and of the courage it took to share them with the world. They were used to change my life...what's God's story in your life? Could it be used to help someone else?
Psalm 145:3-7 says, "Great is the Lord and most worthy of praise; His greatness no one can fathom. One generation will commend your works to another; they will tell of your mighty acts. They will speak of the glorious splendor of your majesty, and I will meditate on your wonderful works. They will tell of the power of your awesome works, and I will proclaim your great deeds. They will celebrate your abundant goodness and joyfully sing of your righteousness."
That pretty much says it all right there...I'm meditating on God's mighty acts and great deeds because those who have gone before me told me of the work He did in their lives. Thank you Father.
Number Two: Have no fear. The title of Fearless speaks to that end. Adam Brown, attacked every task given to him with no fear; he trusted that God was in control of the outcome...so did his wife who walked hand in hand with him through drug addiction and the military life. In I Dared to Call Him Father, Bilquis Sheikh says, "...I was learning what it was like to live from hour to hour. It was the opposite of worrying. It was waiting to see what He was going to allow. For I was convinced that nothing occurred without His permission....I would just live hour to hour, staying near Him." There is no fear when we trust in Him.
In Mark 5:36, Jesus is talking to a father who has just been told his daughter had died; Jesus says, "Don't be afraid; just believe." Jesus brought the girl back to life. He works in mighty ways when we put our fears aside and trust fully in Him.
Number Three: I am spoiled. I have no idea what real suffering is; I have been hurt emotionally...horribly... but ultimately, I have no idea what it's like to stand in a life or death situation having only God to rely on. What courage and Godly strength it must take to stand firm in spite of severe opposition and to know with extreme certainty that you are doing exactly what God wants you to be doing in that moment. To be squarely in His presence. I'm not discounting the "suffering" that I have encountered in my life (or you in yours), but to read of missions on the "front line"...whether in a physical war such as in Fearless, or a spiritual war such as in I Dared to Call Him Father...it puts life into a different perspective, and it opens your eyes to see how much more you could do in the name of Jesus. Step by step, through injury, and strongholds of addiction and fear, God will walk with us and guide us when we are obedient to Him.
Number Four: I need to get in tune with God. I want with all of my heart to hear His voice, and to follow it. Again, in I Dared to Call Him Father , Bilquis says, "Part of the key to staying in His company was obedience. When I obeyed, then I was allowed to remain in His Presence." To be so close to God and in such obedience to Him that I continually feel His Presence with me...how I long to have that...to be that person.
Number Five: "The Moses' Rod Principle". In I Dared to Call Him Father, Bilquis describes this "principle". She says, "When we pray, He wants to work with us...If I just put the problem in the Lord's hands without stepping out in faith myself, I might never have gotten the clearance (speaking of a document she needed to obtain). I had to step out and do everything I could... Just as God required Moses to strike the rock with a rod, He asks us, too, to participate in the working of miracles" (Numbers 20). God wants me to do my part in the fulfillment of His plan.
Number Six: Give 100% all the time. In Fearless, Adam Brown gave all he had in every situation; no matter how menial the task given to him, he jumped in with both feet and worked until it was completed. In I Dared to Call Him Father, Bilquis Sheikh walked away from everything she had ever know, her traditions and her family, to follow Jesus 100%. That's what God wants from us: every part of us...glorifying Him in all we do... Why is that so hard sometimes?
Number Seven: I need to let go of worry. Again, in I Dared to Call Him Father, Bilquis says, "This nervousness is not founded in You. I cannot trust You and worry at the same time!" I think I need to post that on every wall in my house. Worry is not of God. Philippians 4:6-7 says, "Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus."
As all of these thoughts roll around inside of my mind and my heart, I am confident of this: When we lay everything aside, when we "throw off everything that hinders and the sin that so easily entangles" (Hebrews 12:1), and when we, in obedience, step out in faith towards Him, we find that true joy can only be found in His Presence.
I am on a journey to live in His Presence; I long to fearlessly walk with Him always. How about you?
Sunday, July 22, 2012
My Family
I love my family; my parents are amazing and have stood by me through everything in my life...both happy and sad. They are my biggest supporters, my biggest contributors...my biggest fans. They love me completely and unconditionally. I have an older brother, and even though we weren't always friends growing up, I wouldn't trade him for anything; he is quiet and strong, loving and gentle. I love my family, and while they are always just a phone call away when I need someone to talk to, they are not always physically right here when I need them to be. Don't get me wrong, my parents and brother would (and have) jump on the first flight to be by my side when tragedy strikes; they are with me always, but God has been teaching me an important lesson about family lately, and I wanted to share it with you.
Being married to a military man means that your life is always unpredictable. You learn to cherish the stability you have in the moment; you learn to jump in the water with both feet because your time there could be over in the blink of an eye, and then you're on to something new. You learn to make the most out of the time you have together because often it's short, and the days and nights alone are long without good memories to get you through. When you're three thousand miles away from your family, and your husband is deployed halfway around the world, life could become overwhelming...if not for something God set in place at the beginning of time...your heavenly family.
I have thought quite a bit lately about Mark 3: 31-35:
Being married to a military man means that your life is always unpredictable. You learn to cherish the stability you have in the moment; you learn to jump in the water with both feet because your time there could be over in the blink of an eye, and then you're on to something new. You learn to make the most out of the time you have together because often it's short, and the days and nights alone are long without good memories to get you through. When you're three thousand miles away from your family, and your husband is deployed halfway around the world, life could become overwhelming...if not for something God set in place at the beginning of time...your heavenly family.
I have thought quite a bit lately about Mark 3: 31-35:
"Then Jesus' mother and brother arrived (at a house where Jesus was speaking). Standing outside, they sent someone in to call him. A crowd was sitting around him, and they told him, 'Your mother and brothers are outside looking for you.'
'Who are my mother and brothers?' he asked.
Then he looked at those seated in a circle around him and said, 'Here are my mother and my brothers! Whoever does God's will is my brother and sister and mother.'"
I've been thinking on that passage because as a military family, our military friends become our family when we are so far away from the homes we know. We rely on each other, trust each other, and call on each other when we need help.
I've been thinking about it too because God has brought women into my life this year, other military wives who are wonderful Christian women , and He has showed me my need for them...in a deep way. In the midst of what has been the hardest year of my life, God placed these women right here and right now for His purpose; He has given me the family that I needed to walk through this phase of my life with me. The more I get to know these women, the more I see how much I've been missing out on trying to walk my Christian path alone...we need each other. While God does give us an earthly family, He also gives us heavenly families, and if we accept the love of our heavenly families, if we see past our differences and learn to trust each other, they can impact us just as much, or more, than our earthly families (good news for those of you who don't have the best biological families!)
As I sat in church this morning, flanked by my two close friends E and H, I couldn't help but to smile broadly. I even thought of lifting my hands to the Lord because for a moment, as we sang praises together in that sanctuary, I glimpsed heaven. For a moment, I could imagine the day we enter into His glory, and side by side with my heavenly family, we sing praises to Him.
E calls H and I her "sharpeners". I love it. She's referring to Proverbs 27:17, "As iron sharpens iron, so one man sharpens another." Do you have "sharpeners" in your life? I hope so. If not, find them; ask God to surround you with brothers and sisters who do His will. They are your family, and you were meant to live in community with them.
I thank God for my brothers and sisters here in CA; God knew that this year, more than any other, I would need to be "sharpened".
Maybe it's time to check who you surround yourself with; who are your mothers and brothers? There's no doubt that Jesus loved his earthly family, but He saw the bigger picture: some day all of this will pass away...everything we know on this earth...houses, possessions, earthly relationships...everything here is temporary. What is eternal is whether we choose God or deny God...period.
Jesus came to "seek and to save the lost" (Luke 19:10); He taught His disciples to "go and make disciples of all nations, baptizing them in the name of the Father, and of the Son, and of the Holy Spirit, and teaching them to obey everything I have commanded you." (Matthew 28:19) That's still our job, you know? To teach each other about Jesus, about what He commanded, and about His free gift of salvation. He gave us each other, as Christians, to be accountable and to "sharpen" each other as we do His work here on earth.
Find your "sharpeners"; get involved with a small group, and start meeting with like minded brothers and sisters who will hold you up, and push you forward. They are your heavenly family. Your earthly family may or may not know Christ, they may or may not be a part of your heavenly family...love them, but realize they are just a part of God's bigger picture of who your family is. Look around and see if you glimpse a part of Him in someone He has placed in your life; if so, open your arms and embrace your brother or sister. Sharpen each other as you do His work, understanding that when the world passes away, together you will be singing praises to God for eternity.
Friday, July 20, 2012
Hold the Cake
I am a cake-o-holic. Bad day? Let's get a cake. Good day? Cake time! Your best friend's sister's co-worker had a baby? Let's celebrate...I'll pick up a cake. I love cake; not just any cake though...the cheap grocery store kind. That thick, sugary frosting that leaves a film in your mouth...oh yeah..that's the best.
The problem with my cake addiction is that it's not good for my body; I gain weight as soon as I open my mouth to let in a delicious fork full. A moment on the lips, a lifetime on Amanda's love handles; I pay a price for my indulgence, so I'm careful not to over-do it...at least not all the time...
I finished reading Job this morning, and while I had been taking it just two chapters at a time, I read the last eight in one sitting. There was something about reading God's direct words that made it impossible for me to stop; they are powerful and convicting. When I was done, I put my bible down, got up to put my breakfast dishes in the sink, and for some reason this thought floated through my mind, "Life is not a piece of cake".
Now, it could be that I haven't had cake in a while, or it could be that we are going to a friend's birthday party today...and there will be cake..., or it could be that somewhere along the way recently I heard someone say the overused phrase, "that's a piece of cake"... Either way, I started thinking about it. My adult life has in no way been a "piece of cake"; in fact, most adults I know haven't had the "piece of cake" life maybe they wish they could have had.
Well...time for some truth: God didn't promise us life was going to be a "piece of cake". In fact, in John 16:33 Jesus directly tell us, "In this world you will have trouble..." Ugh. Catch the last part of that verse though, "...But take heart!! I have overcome the world." Ahhh. That's right, He's got it covered.
Let's look at what Romans 5:3-5 says of trouble (or suffering), "...we also rejoice in our sufferings because we know that suffering produces perseverance; perseverance, character; and character, hope. And hope does not disappoint us because God has poured out His love into our hearts by the Holy Spirit, whom He has given us."
Do you rejoice in your suffering? Do you understand that the trouble you face builds perseverance in you? And that from perseverance character and hope are formed? When God holds back the cake, He gives you something that is worth so much more; when we walk through trouble, though we may not understand the "whys" of it, we become stronger. When we look to God, and when we ask Him for guidance, and continually thank Him in the midst of our pain, transformation happens, and suddenly character and hope spring forth. When through the tears in your eyes you can glimpse God's beauty, and when through the pain in your heart you can feel His unfailing love, you begin to accept that the "whys" don't matter...it's the "where am I going to go from here", and the "what am I going to do with this", and the "how can I glorify God in the midst of this" questions that define you. Step by step you make it through, and step by step God provides the strength...the perseverance...to carry on.
Several months back I was in the middle of a pivotal point in my life; I faced an incredibly difficult decision, and the pain in my heart was intense. One day I found myself in a conversation with a stranger in an airport; all I wanted was to be left alone, but this man kept pushing me to talk, and when I finally did, I realized it was a God moment. After I finished telling him my story, he looked at me and asked me what I was afraid of. He asked me if what I was facing was going to physically kill me. "No," I said, "I'm just afraid of getting hurt." The point he made to me that day was that life carries on, if what we face isn't going to kill us, we shouldn't fear...living in fear isn't living...that isn't faith. If I got hurt again, he said, "you pick up and move on..." We are called to persevere, and to follow God's leading.
Life isn't a "piece of cake", but cake doesn't produce character or hope; cake makes you over-weight and sluggish. Cake weighs you down and makes you soft all over. As Christians we are called to "run with perseverance the race marked out for us..." (Hebrews 12:1); runners don't fill themselves with cake before a race.
I'm not asking that God make my life terrible and painful each step of the way, nor am I looking at someone who has had a relatively easy life and saying, "you don't know anything about perseverance or character or hope"...I'm just saying that I don't mind that life hasn't been "cake" for me. I am who I am because of my suffering, and I am thanking God that He allowed me to walk through that...and that He walked through it with me.
Earlier in the book Job, he and his friends debated over why God was "punishing" him; his friends insisted that Job must have had some sin that he would not acknowledge; Job insisted that he was righteous and that God just abandoned him for some reason. In the last chapters of Job, God speaks directly to Job and basically (this is totally my paraphrase) says this, "Even with all of your earthly knowledge, you can't begin to understand everything I do...I am Lord of everything and I set everything in motion...I know and see everything on this earth...nothing is unknown to Me...don't try to begin to understand My ways....JUST TRUST ME."
My study bible says that God's view of suffering is this: Suffering causes us to trust God for who He is, not what He does.
Can you thank God when there's no "cake" in your life? When there's no cause for celebration, can you trust that He still sees you and still loves you? When you don't have that sugary, yummy film in your mouth can you still sing praises to Him? He is worthy. Even when we can't understand, or begin to see what the purpose behind our suffering might be, we can still trust Him. He never leaves us, or forsakes us (Deuteronomy 31:6); you are precious to Him, and He knows every fear and every hurt you feel. Persevere, ask Him for strength as your character grows, and when you feel His hope you will not be disappointed.
After everything Job went through, after all that he suffered, he humbled himself before God...He had no response when God questioned him because he was righteous and he understood that whatever earthly knowledge he had could not stand up to God's wisdom and knowledge. When Job humbled himself, God blessed him. Job 42:9 says, "the Lord made him prosperous again and gave him twice as much as he had before."
Whatever His reason might be, sometimes God chooses to "hold the cake" for a while; when He does, stay humble, stay thankful, and stay faithful to the One who sees everything.
The problem with my cake addiction is that it's not good for my body; I gain weight as soon as I open my mouth to let in a delicious fork full. A moment on the lips, a lifetime on Amanda's love handles; I pay a price for my indulgence, so I'm careful not to over-do it...at least not all the time...
I finished reading Job this morning, and while I had been taking it just two chapters at a time, I read the last eight in one sitting. There was something about reading God's direct words that made it impossible for me to stop; they are powerful and convicting. When I was done, I put my bible down, got up to put my breakfast dishes in the sink, and for some reason this thought floated through my mind, "Life is not a piece of cake".
Now, it could be that I haven't had cake in a while, or it could be that we are going to a friend's birthday party today...and there will be cake..., or it could be that somewhere along the way recently I heard someone say the overused phrase, "that's a piece of cake"... Either way, I started thinking about it. My adult life has in no way been a "piece of cake"; in fact, most adults I know haven't had the "piece of cake" life maybe they wish they could have had.
Well...time for some truth: God didn't promise us life was going to be a "piece of cake". In fact, in John 16:33 Jesus directly tell us, "In this world you will have trouble..." Ugh. Catch the last part of that verse though, "...But take heart!! I have overcome the world." Ahhh. That's right, He's got it covered.
Let's look at what Romans 5:3-5 says of trouble (or suffering), "...we also rejoice in our sufferings because we know that suffering produces perseverance; perseverance, character; and character, hope. And hope does not disappoint us because God has poured out His love into our hearts by the Holy Spirit, whom He has given us."
Do you rejoice in your suffering? Do you understand that the trouble you face builds perseverance in you? And that from perseverance character and hope are formed? When God holds back the cake, He gives you something that is worth so much more; when we walk through trouble, though we may not understand the "whys" of it, we become stronger. When we look to God, and when we ask Him for guidance, and continually thank Him in the midst of our pain, transformation happens, and suddenly character and hope spring forth. When through the tears in your eyes you can glimpse God's beauty, and when through the pain in your heart you can feel His unfailing love, you begin to accept that the "whys" don't matter...it's the "where am I going to go from here", and the "what am I going to do with this", and the "how can I glorify God in the midst of this" questions that define you. Step by step you make it through, and step by step God provides the strength...the perseverance...to carry on.
Several months back I was in the middle of a pivotal point in my life; I faced an incredibly difficult decision, and the pain in my heart was intense. One day I found myself in a conversation with a stranger in an airport; all I wanted was to be left alone, but this man kept pushing me to talk, and when I finally did, I realized it was a God moment. After I finished telling him my story, he looked at me and asked me what I was afraid of. He asked me if what I was facing was going to physically kill me. "No," I said, "I'm just afraid of getting hurt." The point he made to me that day was that life carries on, if what we face isn't going to kill us, we shouldn't fear...living in fear isn't living...that isn't faith. If I got hurt again, he said, "you pick up and move on..." We are called to persevere, and to follow God's leading.
Life isn't a "piece of cake", but cake doesn't produce character or hope; cake makes you over-weight and sluggish. Cake weighs you down and makes you soft all over. As Christians we are called to "run with perseverance the race marked out for us..." (Hebrews 12:1); runners don't fill themselves with cake before a race.
I'm not asking that God make my life terrible and painful each step of the way, nor am I looking at someone who has had a relatively easy life and saying, "you don't know anything about perseverance or character or hope"...I'm just saying that I don't mind that life hasn't been "cake" for me. I am who I am because of my suffering, and I am thanking God that He allowed me to walk through that...and that He walked through it with me.
Earlier in the book Job, he and his friends debated over why God was "punishing" him; his friends insisted that Job must have had some sin that he would not acknowledge; Job insisted that he was righteous and that God just abandoned him for some reason. In the last chapters of Job, God speaks directly to Job and basically (this is totally my paraphrase) says this, "Even with all of your earthly knowledge, you can't begin to understand everything I do...I am Lord of everything and I set everything in motion...I know and see everything on this earth...nothing is unknown to Me...don't try to begin to understand My ways....JUST TRUST ME."
My study bible says that God's view of suffering is this: Suffering causes us to trust God for who He is, not what He does.
Can you thank God when there's no "cake" in your life? When there's no cause for celebration, can you trust that He still sees you and still loves you? When you don't have that sugary, yummy film in your mouth can you still sing praises to Him? He is worthy. Even when we can't understand, or begin to see what the purpose behind our suffering might be, we can still trust Him. He never leaves us, or forsakes us (Deuteronomy 31:6); you are precious to Him, and He knows every fear and every hurt you feel. Persevere, ask Him for strength as your character grows, and when you feel His hope you will not be disappointed.
After everything Job went through, after all that he suffered, he humbled himself before God...He had no response when God questioned him because he was righteous and he understood that whatever earthly knowledge he had could not stand up to God's wisdom and knowledge. When Job humbled himself, God blessed him. Job 42:9 says, "the Lord made him prosperous again and gave him twice as much as he had before."
Whatever His reason might be, sometimes God chooses to "hold the cake" for a while; when He does, stay humble, stay thankful, and stay faithful to the One who sees everything.
Tuesday, July 17, 2012
Hidden Treasures
One of the interesting parts of military life is the constant moving. It's always on your mind whether you've just moved to a new station, whether you are in the middle of your tour, or whether you are about to move on to your next one. It's something we all talk about, and it's something that fills you with both excitement and dread.
You might think that moving so often would deter us from acquiring too much stuff; after all, who wants to pack and unpack a houseful of goods every 2 to 3 years? We do, apparently! We made a decision early on in our marriage that even though we would never be in one place too long, we would make whatever state, and whatever house we were in, our home...and we like our home filled with stuff.
I don't mind moving; the process isn't really that difficult. Movers come, they pack, they load a truck, and on the other side they unload and we are set to make another house our home. Inevitably though, there are boxes that just never get unpacked. You know the ones...they are marked "Misc", or "Books", or "Office". Some boxes move from garage to garage to garage, never seeing the light of day. I love those "mystery" boxes; they are filled with things you don't really miss in your everyday life, but when opened reveal treasures long forgotten.
I opened one such box this afternoon. I was in search of a set of books I had promised to lend a friend, and my quest brought me to a box simply marked "books". Now let me explain, we have about 10 unopened boxes labeled "books"...we love books in our home, but have no place for a library in our current house. It didn't take me long to locate the series I was looking for, but hidden among them I came across a book that was given to me years ago...I had never read it, but it has moved with me back and forth across the country, multiple times over the past 11 years. It's just a small book, pocket sized really, but as I cracked it open today I soon discovered the message inside was huge.
The book is simply entitled If , and it was written by a woman named Amy Carmichael. Amy was born in Ireland in 1867, and spent most of her life working as a missionary in India. In describing how this amazingly simple, yet profound book came to be, Amy states, "...sentence by sentence the "Ifs" came, almost as if spoken aloud in the inward ear." As a "want-to-be" writer and one who longs for God to use me as He sees fit, this statement stood out to me; Amy Carmichael was a woman who devoted her life to serving God and to listening for His voice in all she did...how I long to be like that.
The thing about my discovery of this book that is amazing to me is that I have had this book since before I was married. It's something that I could have easily "purged" on one of our moves, or misplaced here or there along the way...goodness knows how much we have lost during our 10 (or so) moves...but I didn't, it's been right there in our garage for years: a treasure hidden until it was revealed. The thing is, before right now...where I am in my walk today...it wouldn't have meant much to me. I wasn't ready for it then, but now I am. Today, the words of Amy Carmichael...a woman who died almost 30 years before I was born...have revolutionized my heart and have taken me to a whole new level of awareness about myself in Christ. God does that; He reveals all things at the proper time.
She says in the introduction of the book that all of the "ifs" are not meant to be read in one sitting; that you should "here and there" read what is needed. I confess that I sat down and read them all; some touched me deeply as they illuminated where I still lack in the knowledge and application of God's love in my life; some I will come back to "here and there" to ponder and pray about.
I found a treasure today, and God revealed a little more of Himself to me in an unexpected place. The key to finding His hidden treasures is having a heart open to revelation at any time, in any situation. God speaks to us clearly when we chose to listen. Open your eyes, your ears, and your heart to hear Him when He says, "You are ready ... I have something to teach you ..."
I wanted to share a few of Amy's "Ifs" with you; these are just a couple that jumped out as things that I need to grasp and apply in my own life.
"If I can easily discuss the shortcomings and the sins of any; if I can speak in a casual way even of a child's misdoings, then I know nothing of Calvary love."
"If I enjoy a joke at the expense of another; if I can in any way slight another in conversation, or even in thought, then I know nothing of Calvary love."
"If in dealing with one who does not respond, I weary of the strain, and slip from under the burden, then I know nothing of Calvary love."
"If I cast up a confessed, repented, and forsaken sin against another, and allow my remembrance of that sin to color my thinking and feed my suspicions, then I know nothing of Calvary love."
"If a sudden jar can cause me to speak an impatient, unloving word, then I know nothing of Calvary love. **For a cup brimful of sweet water cannot spill even one drop of bitter water, however suddenly jolted."
"If I say, 'Yes, I forgive, but I cannot forget,' as though the God, who twice a day washes all the sands on all the shores of the all the world, could not wash such memories from my mind, then I know nothing of Calvary love."
I could quote the whole book, I guess. I love it. I will end with this one though:
"If I covet any place on earth but the dust at the foot of the cross, then I know nothing of Calvary love."
I have quite a bit to learn about "Calvary love"; I thank God for His word, and for the words of others who listen to His voice and who share the gifts they receive with the rest of us. I thank God that He reveals Himself at just the right time, and in just the right way.
In Mark 4:21-25 Jesus says, "Do you bring in a lamp to put it under a bowl or a bed? Instead, don't you put it on its stand? For whatever is hidden is meant to be disclosed, and whatever is concealed is meant to be brought out into the open. If anyone has ears to hear, let him hear. Consider carefully what you hear...with the measure you use, it will be measured to you- and even more. Whoever has will be given more; whoever does not have, even what he has will be taken from him."
I hope that if God is bringing something into the light for you, you will chose to hear what He is saying; when you hear it, apply it...when you use the knowledge and wisdom God gives you according to His will, He will continue to reveal Himself to you. It is an amazing, beautiful gift...knowing and being known by your Heavenly Father.
Perhaps it's time for you to search for the hidden treasure He is waiting for you to discover...
You might think that moving so often would deter us from acquiring too much stuff; after all, who wants to pack and unpack a houseful of goods every 2 to 3 years? We do, apparently! We made a decision early on in our marriage that even though we would never be in one place too long, we would make whatever state, and whatever house we were in, our home...and we like our home filled with stuff.
I don't mind moving; the process isn't really that difficult. Movers come, they pack, they load a truck, and on the other side they unload and we are set to make another house our home. Inevitably though, there are boxes that just never get unpacked. You know the ones...they are marked "Misc", or "Books", or "Office". Some boxes move from garage to garage to garage, never seeing the light of day. I love those "mystery" boxes; they are filled with things you don't really miss in your everyday life, but when opened reveal treasures long forgotten.
I opened one such box this afternoon. I was in search of a set of books I had promised to lend a friend, and my quest brought me to a box simply marked "books". Now let me explain, we have about 10 unopened boxes labeled "books"...we love books in our home, but have no place for a library in our current house. It didn't take me long to locate the series I was looking for, but hidden among them I came across a book that was given to me years ago...I had never read it, but it has moved with me back and forth across the country, multiple times over the past 11 years. It's just a small book, pocket sized really, but as I cracked it open today I soon discovered the message inside was huge.
The book is simply entitled If , and it was written by a woman named Amy Carmichael. Amy was born in Ireland in 1867, and spent most of her life working as a missionary in India. In describing how this amazingly simple, yet profound book came to be, Amy states, "...sentence by sentence the "Ifs" came, almost as if spoken aloud in the inward ear." As a "want-to-be" writer and one who longs for God to use me as He sees fit, this statement stood out to me; Amy Carmichael was a woman who devoted her life to serving God and to listening for His voice in all she did...how I long to be like that.
The thing about my discovery of this book that is amazing to me is that I have had this book since before I was married. It's something that I could have easily "purged" on one of our moves, or misplaced here or there along the way...goodness knows how much we have lost during our 10 (or so) moves...but I didn't, it's been right there in our garage for years: a treasure hidden until it was revealed. The thing is, before right now...where I am in my walk today...it wouldn't have meant much to me. I wasn't ready for it then, but now I am. Today, the words of Amy Carmichael...a woman who died almost 30 years before I was born...have revolutionized my heart and have taken me to a whole new level of awareness about myself in Christ. God does that; He reveals all things at the proper time.
She says in the introduction of the book that all of the "ifs" are not meant to be read in one sitting; that you should "here and there" read what is needed. I confess that I sat down and read them all; some touched me deeply as they illuminated where I still lack in the knowledge and application of God's love in my life; some I will come back to "here and there" to ponder and pray about.
I found a treasure today, and God revealed a little more of Himself to me in an unexpected place. The key to finding His hidden treasures is having a heart open to revelation at any time, in any situation. God speaks to us clearly when we chose to listen. Open your eyes, your ears, and your heart to hear Him when He says, "You are ready ... I have something to teach you ..."
I wanted to share a few of Amy's "Ifs" with you; these are just a couple that jumped out as things that I need to grasp and apply in my own life.
"If I can easily discuss the shortcomings and the sins of any; if I can speak in a casual way even of a child's misdoings, then I know nothing of Calvary love."
"If I enjoy a joke at the expense of another; if I can in any way slight another in conversation, or even in thought, then I know nothing of Calvary love."
"If in dealing with one who does not respond, I weary of the strain, and slip from under the burden, then I know nothing of Calvary love."
"If I cast up a confessed, repented, and forsaken sin against another, and allow my remembrance of that sin to color my thinking and feed my suspicions, then I know nothing of Calvary love."
"If a sudden jar can cause me to speak an impatient, unloving word, then I know nothing of Calvary love. **For a cup brimful of sweet water cannot spill even one drop of bitter water, however suddenly jolted."
"If I say, 'Yes, I forgive, but I cannot forget,' as though the God, who twice a day washes all the sands on all the shores of the all the world, could not wash such memories from my mind, then I know nothing of Calvary love."
I could quote the whole book, I guess. I love it. I will end with this one though:
"If I covet any place on earth but the dust at the foot of the cross, then I know nothing of Calvary love."
I have quite a bit to learn about "Calvary love"; I thank God for His word, and for the words of others who listen to His voice and who share the gifts they receive with the rest of us. I thank God that He reveals Himself at just the right time, and in just the right way.
In Mark 4:21-25 Jesus says, "Do you bring in a lamp to put it under a bowl or a bed? Instead, don't you put it on its stand? For whatever is hidden is meant to be disclosed, and whatever is concealed is meant to be brought out into the open. If anyone has ears to hear, let him hear. Consider carefully what you hear...with the measure you use, it will be measured to you- and even more. Whoever has will be given more; whoever does not have, even what he has will be taken from him."
I hope that if God is bringing something into the light for you, you will chose to hear what He is saying; when you hear it, apply it...when you use the knowledge and wisdom God gives you according to His will, He will continue to reveal Himself to you. It is an amazing, beautiful gift...knowing and being known by your Heavenly Father.
Perhaps it's time for you to search for the hidden treasure He is waiting for you to discover...
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